A few weeks ago, while in a down dog yoga pose, I noted a fascinating parallel between physical mobility and interpersonal agility: both thrive when we keep our range of motion high. I had just heard Dr. Kelly Starrett, DPT, on the @Huberman Lab podcast, explain one of the best ways to maintain overall well-being as we age. We need to use our bodies in diverse ways everyday (beyond “exercise-only” routines) — sitting on the floor, lifting grocery bags, and bending and reaching in various ways. When the variety and frequency drop, we lose that range of motion and the associated strength that helps us move through the world. The same holds true for the range of conversations we engage in.
A broad conversational repertoire includes expressing a variety of sentiments, asking tough questions, requesting help, celebrating, initiating feedback, and so on. Maintaining an active repertoire makes us agile communicators at work and home – as we use our conversational “muscles” to empower, inspire, appreciate, coach, bond, and learn from others.
Right before that yoga class, I had almost avoided a challenging feedback conversation with a nonprofit CEO. I knew I’d be outside my comfort zone, much like an unfamiliar physical stretch that could do more harm. A colleague encouraged me to follow through with an honest conversation. My initial discomfort was worth it. The CEO appreciated the input, shared insights I hadn’t considered, and reaffirmed our shared commitment to candid conversations. Had I stayed small and cautious, and let my “candor muscle” atrophy, future candor would likely get even harder.
Just like yoga poses become easier with practice, different conversational “moves” flow better with use. So I aim to sustain and expand my conversational range—professionally and personally—despite fear and hesitation. It feels like a courageous but manageable goal!
What about you? Is there a type of conversation that you are avoiding that would keep you feeling strong, confident, and effective with others? Maybe it’s expressions of appreciation or humility, or asserting your wants and boundaries, or offering your ideas and feedback.
A modest New Year intention: Get your conversational “reps” in early in 2025 in ways that serve you and others!
